Dear Child,

Mom and Dad didn’t plan you. We weren’t ready for you. We hadn’t decided the time was right to bring you into the world. No, your presence here is so much more miraculous than that.

God Himself so needed you on this earth, in this family, in His kingdom, that He bypassed us altogether. He couldn’t leave your existence up to us, lest our decision inhibit His marvelous plans for you.

You had been inside of me for 7 weeks when I first saw your heartbeat on that screen; now you have been outside me for 7 weeks. The weeks in between were a storm, and sometimes the rain poured down.

But child, do you see? You are the seed planted by God Himself. That which He sows, He also grows. The rain that He brought to water you caused us to squint our eyes against the pelting droplets, fixing our eyes on Him all the more. My pregnancy wasn’t all sunshine, because you needed the rain to grow.

You, my dear, are the first seed of our family, and your life will produce a hundred times that which was sown. He will sustain you, and He will give us all that we need to provide for you.

Because our family was incomplete without you. Though we thought just the two of us was enough for now, we were wrong. You came from us, and you are a piece of us. Without you, we lack part of ourselves.

You are not a mistake, you are a surprise. You are a beautiful wildflower that popped up with no cultivation or curation.

No, you weren’t part of our plan, but you have always been part of God’s. He has had your name written in His book since before time began. We have been entrusted with your life for a time, to shape and to shepherd. But you have always belonged to Him.

Because His family was incomplete without you. 

Like I didn’t know then all that you would be now, I can’t possibly imagine all that you’ll become. But I do know that you are loved beyond measure. You are precious and cherished. It’s like you’ve always been here, and I’ve always been your mama.

So as I stare into your big blue eyes, I thank God that He didn’t follow my plans and saw you in the dark of my womb.

As I breathe in your sweet baby smell and your fluffy hair tickles my nose, I thank Him for breathing you into existence and not leaving it up to me.

As I watch you sleep peacefully, I rest in Him, knowing your life has always been His.

Love,

Mama

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart.” – Jeremiah 1:5

“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” – Philippians 1:6

“Still other seed fell on good soil, where it produced a crop—a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown.” – Matthew 13:8

“You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.” – Psalm 139:16

Read the story of Raphael’s birth here.

October 27, 2017

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